Beauty Is in the Eye of the Beholder

A Daughter's Love Edition

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

But no one talks about how perception is built.

Who taught you what was beautiful?

Who taught you what was worthy?

Who taught you what was enough?

Because I grew up believing beautiful eyes were hazel.

Blue.

Grey.

Green.

Exotic.

Rare.

Different from mine.

So when people complimented my eyes growing up, I didn’t believe them.

Not because they were lying.

But because my perception had already decided what was beautiful.

And perception, when repeated long enough, becomes identity.

The Moment That Shifted Me

A couple years ago, I went to my daughter’s parent teacher conference.

There was an assignment on the wall.

“Write about your favorite body part.”

She chose her eyes.

Her eyes.

And I paused.

Because she loved something about herself that I had quietly compared in myself.

She wasn’t measuring them against anyone else’s.

She wasn’t asking if they were rare enough.

She just chose them.

And in that moment, I realized something.

My daughter loving her eyes made me question why I didn’t love mine.

That was the beginning of my shift.

It Was Never About the Color

It was never about the shade.

It was always about what my eyes carried.

My spirit.

My soul.

My energy.

People weren’t complimenting my eyes.

They were complimenting the truth behind them.

And now that I can look in the mirror and see all of me, I love my eyes.

Because my eyes don’t just carry my features.

They carry my pain and my struggle.

They carry my strength.

They carry my future and my past.

They’ve witnessed every version of me.

They’ve carried survival.

They’ve carried softness.

They’ve carried vision.

They’ve carried the version of me that always knew there was more.

And when I look at my daughter’s eyes, I see that same knowing.

The Psychology of Perception

As a therapist, I understand something now that I didn’t understand then.

Perception shapes self worth.

If you grow up around eyes that only see flaws, you will search for flaws.

If you grow up around comparison, you will compete with yourself.

If you grow up around scarcity, you will shrink.

But if you grow up being told you are beautiful, smart, worthy, and capable, you move differently.

My daughter moves differently.

Not because life is easier.

But because she sees herself clearly.

And clarity is power.

Divine Feminine Energy

She is divine feminine energy.

Soft.

Secure.

Grounded.

Not fragile.

Certain.

She is the most caring and loving person I’ve ever met.

She is the good that outweighs everything for me.

When she was born, I had never seen such beautiful eyes.

Not because of their color.

But because her spirit was beauty.

And you could see it.

For a long time, I couldn’t see mine.

Until I saw her see hers.

She didn’t just help me raise her.

She helped me evolve.

She helped me choose myself.

She Was Meant to Be Here

Here’s another truth.

I had just had my IUD removed.

Not even two weeks later, I was pregnant with her.

Despite taking the morning after pill.

Despite getting the birth control shot.

She survived.

She thrived.

She was meant to be here.

And I believe she came exactly when I needed her.

Because she didn’t just change my life.

She elevated my perception.

She made me softer.

She made me stronger.

She made me see differently.

Beauty Is in the Eye of the Beholder

Beauty is not about color.

It’s about consciousness.

It’s about how you see yourself when no one is watching.

It’s about the lens you choose.

If the eyes around you are wounded, insecure, or full of low self worth, you will start seeing yourself through distortion.

Sometimes your healing is not changing your face.

It’s changing your perspective.

And sometimes, the most powerful beholder you will ever have is your child.

My daughter is the beholder of beauty for me.

Her spirit is beauty.

And you can see it in her eyes.

And now, I can see it in mine.

Ci Notes

Affirmation:

I see myself clearly and without comparison.

What beliefs about beauty did I inherit that were never mine?

Who am I when I choose to be my own beholder?

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

And I finally understand what that means.